How Do You Process Separation?

Benjamin Kreps:

Hey everyone, this is Ben Kreps. Welcome to the Mark Prater podcast where our goal is to connect our global family of churches to our Executive Director. Hey Mark, how are you doing?

Mark Prater:

I'm doing very well. Ben, how are you?

Benjamin Kreps:

I'm doing great. Great to see you. Hey, so today I wanted to ask you a more personal question. How are you processing the churches that have left Sovereign Grace? Last year if you go back on the blog we can find you sharing some thoughts and some encouragement, sort of biblical, gospel-centered underpinnings of peaceful separation. But I wanted to ask you today: What's it like for you as the Executive Director to experience the loss of a number of churches, some of them that have been around for a long time and people that you know? What's that been like for you?

Mark Prater:

Thanks for asking. I process it probably a couple of different ways. I process it personally and I process it organizationally. Let me start with personally. Quite frankly, it's hard to see these churches leave, because they're led by men who are friends and have been partners and in some sense remain partners in the gospel—men that I've worked closely with. Two of the churches that left are led by men who were on the Leadership Team: Craig Cabaniss, for a period of time, and then Ian the entire time that I've been the Executive Director right alongside of me on the Leadership Team.

Benjamin Kreps:

You've worked in partnership for decades with a number of these guys.

Mark Prater:

That's right. Yeah. That's what makes it difficult.

Benjamin Kreps:

It's difficult. How do you process this experience?

Mark Prater:

Well, probably a couple of ways. First of all, I'm so glad we're reformed. I can take my soul to good theology and the sovereignty of God in particular. And essentially, you know, that allows any of us to trust that the decisions these churches made to separate peacefully separate is really a part of God's sovereignty. And I may not understand it all, but I can get comfort and I can trust God with their departures.

But the other way that I process is I pray for them. In fact, it was just a couple of days ago I was praying for many of the churches that left at the end of last year and just praying that God would prosper them in their gospel ministry. Praying that way helps my soul, and I think it honors God.

Benjamin Kreps:

So you also said that you process it by thinking corporately about all of this. What did you mean by that?

Mark Prater:

What I mean by that is the Council of Elders at our meeting in August voted very clearly about philosophical issues related to leadership and third party and even polity (how it works). So, leaving that meeting, the Leadership Team just was grateful for the clarity we have from the Council of Elders on how to serve our churches and pastors.

 For some churches that meant they needed to separate because they didn't agree on some of those philosophical issues. That can be helpful. Even though departures and peaceful separation is difficult, I actually think it'll help us as a denomination as we move forward just because we'll have more clarity and unity together.

Benjamin Kreps:

So going forward and thinking about these things, how would you encourage guys in Sovereign Grace that are experiencing the pain of separation (be it peaceful and still friendship exists, but there is a breaking that has happened)? You prayed for, we prayed for guys at our Council of Elders last fall that were feeling sorrow over it. How would you encourage guys as we walk through all of this?

Mark Prater:

It's a great question because I wouldn't expect the sorrow to just lift. I think it's going to take some time. If guys are experiencing sadness and sorrow over churches leaving, that seems quite normal to me. And I don't know how much time it'll take for that to lift, if it does at all.

I would say a couple of things. Don't be afraid to talk about it. Talk to some trusted friends or guides on your pastoral team or within your region about it. Ask them to pray for you. And continue to take your soul and get it in God's word. And remember that there were separations like this, not only in Scripture, but throughout church history. This is a regular part of doing gospel ministry. Just having that perspective can be helpful.

Benjamin Kreps:

It’s difficult because we haven't had to experience a lot of this up until a few years ago and then we've experienced a lot of it in the past few years.

Well, we thank you, Mark (I think I can speak safely for the guys in Sovereign Grace) for your care and the way you seek to care for us and the way you're processing through these things. So thanks for sharing your thoughts, Mark.

Mark Prater:

You're welcome, man. Thanks for asking.

Benjamin Kreps:

And thank you everybody for listening and watching the podcast. We'll see you next time here.